Readers Respond: What is Preventing You From Getting a Vasectomy?

Though vasectomies are over 99% effective, men may:

• Feel uneasy having a doctor tinker around their "manhood" with a scalpel (yet you can get a no-scalpel vasectomy)
  
  
• Falsely think getting a vasectomy will lower your sex drive, testosterone levels and/or affect sexual performance
  
  
• Fear pain after a vasectomy
  
  
• Are scared of regretting this choice and may want a vasectomy reversal
• Think a vasectomy costs too much

If you're considering getting a vasectomy, what are your fears? What's preventing you from getting a vasectomy?

vasectomy vs. TL

After reading these inputs, I'm convinced that I need to go for vasectomy. No way will I allow my wife to do a TL. We've been debating on this for some time now. Thanks all for your invaluable inputs.

—Guest jj

Not all good

I had a vasectomy 2 years ago and have some side effects that were not there before the operation. And now, I get to experience this for the rest of my life. Please make sure you are aware that there may be risks. Male concerns are just as valid as female concerns. Let's all try and remember that.

—Guest Brandon M

my hubby refuses

All th above comments really help. Thanks guys for being so open on this matter. @ 1st I was feeling like my hubby was selfish for refusing to get a vas, but his concerns pull some weight. He's worried that he will lose some of the sensation that comes with ejaculating semen. He was told by a work peer that after a vas he would have a dry "O". His ability to enjoy sex is really important and I'm only worried about undergoing gen. anasthesia 4 a tubal. We've had 3 kids and we're done buildin our fam. I'd rather get myself "fixed" than go thru pregnancy and birth again. Come on ladies! If we can make it thru childbirth, then a tubal shouldn't be so scary. If ur man would do almost anything for u, then u should return the gesture. Men aren't "whimps" for being scared of a vas, they're simply human, and deserve to have their feelings taken seriously. If both partners are scared then consider a different type of birth controll!

—Guest geri

Guess I need to take care of business

I had my second and final child 8 months ago. My hubbie has been talking about having a vasectomy for a year and a half, but has never pulled the trigger. He always brings it up in front of people like he's looking for some kind of social acceptance, meanwhile the majority of men we know have had it done. Meanwhile, I don't enjoy sex as much as I used to because I'm worried about getting pregnant again. I guess it's time that I take the bull by the horns and just have my tubes tied. It didn't even cross my mind when I had my last child, otherwise I would have just had it done while I was having my C. Do your wife a favor, men, and just DO IT!!!! It'll really make your wife happy and will probably free her up sexually to just enjoy herself instead of waiting for you to ruin the moment by pulling out.

—Guest Frustrated

Long term side effects

I am not one bit, even the slightest bit scared about short term pain, but the potential long term side effects scare the living day out of me:

—Guest Peter

There is less risk for the man.

There is less risk for the man than there is for the woman when it comes to sterilization. Men, I hear your concerns and I respect them, but please just do it. Any woman who is worth your time will make it worth it for you. That is what I would do for my husband if I was married. ;)

—IsmailaGodHasHeard

Do it for her

2 little snips vs a woman getting her tubes tied or more detailed surgery is a no brainer. If you love your wife / partner and you're done with having kids, just get it done. Its not a big deal, nothing "stops working", and the discomfort for a couple of days is nothing compared with what women go thru during childbirth or the more extreme surgery they require. Sorry, there's no excuse for men not to get it done if they're done with having kids. None...

—Guest Jerry

It was very easy

I had been thinking about it for years but I hesitated because I was young (under 30) and I heard doctors would not perform the surgery on younger men. My partners were always using oral contraception as well so it was never an issue. As soon as I was over 30 and was involved with someone not using the pill, I had the procedure. It was painless and my doctor was awesome. I spent maybe 3 days taking it easy, playing video games and in general lazing about. It was actually like an forced vacation. My doctor said he often schedules procedures for patients around pro sports playoffs so the men have something to do while they are laid out for a couple days. Listen up guys.... there is nothing stopping this from being a a little vacation for you if you play your cards right. It's really not bad at all and it is so much easier than the comparable operation for a woman that it's grossly unfair to not volunteer for a vasectomy. I sat around playing games for 3 days, how hard is that???

—Guest CM

women who think men are whimps

some ladies just don't get it. we are still feeling the same emotional what if's that you will, we worry about our inadequecies, and we worry also that you will turn your back on a hard working man, who never cheats, is always home with you and in my case never goes out with friends just to spend quality time with his wife and family, as I am working most of the time and have such precious few moments anyway. So yeah to say the least you bear the child/the pain/ the humiliation, and then push for a vas. your husband (again if he is worth his salt) bears the responsibility of providing for you and the family to the point in many cases of sacrificing his own health to see to the family's well being. mark my words, what you are asking him to do for you will scar him to some extent, even if he don't admit it. If he is worth his salt, and undergoes the vas. then love him as he loves you enough to do it for you. He's a good man, willing to help in any way he can with family planning.

—Guest scheduled part 2

women who think men are whimps

I'm a bit appalled at some of the ladies responses, frankly I love my wife enough to schedule a vas, but for women to think men are wimps for not wanting a vas, is totally uncalled for. I'm not saying you ladies don't suffer pain and humiliation. But please consider your husband too. What I am saying is that if you have a husband who is worth his salt, he will feel for you on an emotional level that he will not admit to. As I watched my wife give give to our two children, the pain from her emotions and her pelvis resonated within me, I couldn't bear to hear her scream, but stuck with her and did whatever I could to help her, now we have two children and a third on the way, and each day I wake up with the load of providing for the family, I'm 38, with arthritis is both hands, elbows, shoulders, had trips to the ER for back injuries, and pure collapse from stress. now my wife wants me to have a vas. which even to this point i agree it is easier on the man. but some ladies just don't...

—Guest scheduled part 1

Women are selfish? Really?

Really? Selfish for a woman to ask her husband to get a vasectomy? We went through so much to get pregnant...I gave over 50 vials of blood, had an x-ray of my uterus (that was fun), surgery on my uterus (even more fun), have had more doctors looking at my hoo-haw than I care to even mention, been poked, prodded, and "handled" more times than I can remember, spent 2 hours pushing a 9 pound baby out of an area that didn't want to stretch that big, hence getting cut and taking 10 days before I could even walk again (talk about pain). And this is only half the story. So I'm selfish to ask my husband to have a surgery that will take less than half a day and will cause him some "discomfort". Really??? I guess that's why God made women to have babies...life wouldn't exist if men were the child bearers!

—Guest Pepper